Sunday, March 28, 2010


On Saturday, March 27, 2010 at approximatley 10:00 a.m. my angel put on his furry wings and went to heaven. He waited until I was there and took his last breath while we where together, we were waiting for the doctor to come in and I begged him to go to sleep, and he did.

His body rejected the treatments and no matter how hard to doctors tried they just could not help him.

My heart hurts in a way it has never hurt before....I have lost pets, Nike to cancer and Wickett to old age, but my boy was only 7 and up until Tuesday morning was happy and healthy. He was suppose to be with me forever. He was perfect, the best boy a mom could ask for, I just wish I could have done more to save him. I feel like I failed him, I failed to protect him, I failed to keep him safe, failed to miss a sign that he was sick to catch it sooner. I know I say these things out of hurt and I know oneday I will realize that I spared no expense to help him, but it still hurts.

He will always have a special place in my heart and will never be forgotten. But I would still give everything I have to have him back.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

My baby boy

My baby is sick, very sick, and my heart is broken, beyond broken.....even as I type this I cannot stop the tears.

I took him in for what I thought was a bladder infection, instead at 1:00pm we were loaded in the car on our way to Western Veterinary Specialist Centre in Calgary so he could get blood transfusions.

He has what they think is Immune Mediated Hemolytic Anemia. His own immune system is destroying his red blood cells. Not sure of the cause, the chest x-ray and abdominal scan came back clean so no cancer, he did not eat onions, garlic or Tylenol, not tick answers and its driving me crazy. After his first transfusion his red cell count is up but he is still sad and threw up a few times last night.

I have never prayed so much in my whole life and hoping that at some point I have done something right to help make this go well and for him to get better. There is a 50/50 chance for recovery, I want so badly for him to be the one out of the two dogs that makes it.

I wish I did not care so much, I wish I had talked myself out of getting him when I saw him that day, I wish I was not raised to love animals so much, but most of all I wish this was just a bad dream.

I will continue to hope and pray, he is in the best facility possible to treat this and even if it ends the way I do not want it to I can say I did all I could.